(originally posted on Huffington Post)
Love is not forever and neither are you. Forever is make-believe and that’s okay too.
Like every emotion, your love will change. It can become a new love but it will never the be the same. You will not be who you were last year and your lover won’t be who you fell in love with the next.
If this sounds like the dark ramblings of a single man on Valentine’s Day let me correct you: I am in love and in an excellent relationship. I have a boyfriend who treats me like a prince. I am fortunate.
After a break up a few years back, I wrote a song, to sum up the experience of love’s conclusion – it wasn’t about the situation but the feeling it was inevitable, another cycle had run its course.
I had been beating myself up for my inability to sustain an emotion before realizing the person I was when I felt that way no longer existed. I’d become someone new and even if the man I fell in love with was still somehow the same, I no longer recognized who he’d fallen for and couldn’t trust his love was meant for the new me.
The loss felt eerily familiar and when I wrote ‘Expiration Date’ I wasn’t thinking just of that particular end but of the temporary nature of…everything.
Now here I am years later – finally releasing the song in what feels like the first truly communicative adult relationship of my life and how awkward to explain on Valentine’s Day that ‘Expiration Date’ is not about him but that I still somehow stand by every word? How can I get him to trust me and the love I declare for him?
My best hope is communication. If I explain these changes as they happen and he does the same then perhaps the love we’ve created can change with us. And the men we are a year from now will have a love that’s unique to them, just like ours today is special to who we are now, in this never to be repeated moment.
It sounded sad when I started but it sounds beautiful now that I’ve finished: